In an effort to clean house before our semi-annual visitors (a.k.a. Lauren and family) descend upon us for Thanksgiving and some extra time to boot 😊, I’ve spent the last couple of weeks going through a treasure trove of items I had put away when my mom passed in 2015.
One of the
bags, which contained her photo albums, has provided hours of history,
entertainment, and emotion. The earliest pictures, in which she is a young adult, were in stark contrast to my memories of her on the last Thanksgiving
we shared with our whole family, when she was in her late 90s.
She had
agreed to make the trek to my house, which thrilled me. I was so excited she
wanted to join David’s and my family and would happily be together with all her
children – my siblings and spouses and kids – who were also coming. This was
before the pandemic when our gatherings were well over 30-35 people. I told her
I’d have warm apple cider waiting and that I’d make her favorite sweet potato
casserole and this Ambrosia dessert she liked that my former mother-in-law used
to bring for family get togethers.
When my
sister and sister-in-law brought Mom over, I eagerly went to the door to greet
her, but then we all quickly realized that since she was unable to walk, we’d
have to carry her inside, while sitting in her wheelchair. Luckily my mom had
always been a good sport and didn’t give up when challenges were presented, so
the physically strong women and men at my house were able to bring her inside.
This unpleasant feat – I would assume – for her was well worth it to me, at
least when I was able to take my seat next to hers at our dining room
table.
I wish I had a snapshot of us sitting side by side that night, because I would have framed it so that I could often be reminded of how happy I felt. Photos have a funny way of
transporting us from wherever we are at the moment to another place and time
that we may not have gone to otherwise.
This was
definitely the case when I sat down with my mom’s albums. The first one I
pulled out was one where she looked to be in her 20s and was hanging out with
her girlfriends and boyfriends. She’s having fun in the snow, lounging on the
beach, swimming in the lake or ocean, playing baseball and having a grand old
time. She was much more active than I ever was!
I was
delighted to see the joy she was experiencing with her girlfriends, two of whom
were her BFFs until they passed some years before she did. In mostly every
photo taken of her as a young woman, her beautiful smile is front and center.
Next, I started to see multiple shots of my dad and the two of them looking quite cozy, so I was pretty sure I wouldn’t be seeing more boyfriends. Just a few pages in, I began to see all the offspring: Children #1-#4 (yours truly) with Child #3 – Sherrie – reminding me most of our mom, as she was doing all kinds of athletic things too, like climbing up the trees and on the monkey bars and so on.
Weeks after
sifting through the photos, several thoughts keep replaying: 1 – My mom was an individual,
not JUST my mom; 2 – I feel honored to have gotten a front row seat into her
life when she was so young and vital; 3 – Seeing relatives and friends my mom
held near and dear to her heart has been a pleasure; and 4 - Important photos
need to be printed out if they are going to live on and keep the past alive.
