July 4th

Nothing like the sweet taste of freedom.

July 4th is a time to party under fireworks and at BBQs and to celebrate how far we've come as a nation. I'm happy to do that, as long as we can also footnote some of those segments in the Declaration of Independence where we need to improve as free thinkers and as a civilization and not simply to point to political party dogma, for example, as an excuse for our unjust behavior.

Heavy duty stuff aside, these public displays of patriotism always take me back to my own rendezvous with freedom at distinct periods of my life - in far less consequential ways - but monumental for me as a young adult, nonetheless. 

The first time I recall squealing over my newly-earned independence occurred when I was 16 years old got my driver's license, which meant I was free to go anywhere and, essentially, do anything.  I was - in a word - e l a t e d.  A few years later a friend and I wanted to spend the summer in Atlantic City and we got jobs as tram drivers on the boardwalk.   I can still feel the thrill of looking forward to this adventure.  My next emancipating milestone took place as a result of my first "real" job that provided my first "real" paycheck, which sent me flying, as I was able to make move out of my parents' home.  These days, I feel incredibly liberated to walk out of my office around 5 pm on Friday, knowing I don't have to return until 8 am on Monday. 

I know that the various freedoms I've reveled in over the years have been possible because others before me have fought battles that have paved the way for me and my loved ones, my coworkers, my neighbors and my peers to have choices and dreams which wouldn't have been possible in another age.  I try to tell this to my children, as I'm sure my parents tried to teach me:  It wasn't always like this.   

Had I been born just 75 or 100 years ago, my life as a woman would've been very different.  Take voting, or lack thereof, for women.  There are times I vote in today's elections - when honestly I have no idea who is on the ballot and for what position - simply because I am free to do so.  I was afforded this right because of the grit and determination of the Women's Suffrage Movement and the brave women (and men) in earlier times.  That is reason enough for me to vote.

Had my sister been born in 1900, perhaps she wouldn't have announced her lesbianism in high school as she did some 40 years ago and she may never have seen the day when lesbians and gays could marry.

At night on the holiday itself, in lieu of seeing fireworks, my husband and I watched the gut-wrenching "12 Years a Slave."  I'm still reeling in the horror of it.  I don't know what is more shocking:  the fact that people could treat others so poorly, that people viewed blacks as inferior simply because of the color of their skin, that so many slave owners got away with such atrocious, criminal behavior or that they'd be able to live with themselves for behaving that way.

That's the thing when dissecting the freedoms we as a nation have acquired.  None of them came for free.  Each advancement was achieved through blood, sweat and tears.  Too many are tied to events that have been so incredibly damaging, making me feel as ashamed as I am proud. 

So as the weekend dies down and I transition back into the work week, I will no doubt find myself daydreaming about the opportunities I relished as a free young woman in a relatively free society, that aren't tied to anything disturbing other than, say, growing pains.