Hanukkah

Last week, Anas, one of my sons-in-law who is staying with us for a few months with Lauren and Baby May, asked if we are going to put up some Hanukkah decorations.  

It was clear that he wanted to hear “Yes,” so I wasn’t sure how to explain that Jews don’t decorate for Hanukkah, as I grew up believing. I certainly didn’t want him to view me as a naysayer, or a curmudgeon, which I’ve often accused David of being around the holidays.

Since I wanted him to understand the reasoning behind the naked look of the house this time of year – relative to many of the others in the neighborhood, at least from the outside – I explained that decorations in wintertime have historically been centered around Christmas.

He then cited a home or two on our street that are adorned with menorahs and Jewish stars, and I too told him about the one I noticed across from our house with blue lights and glitzy Hannukah banners, both of which I assumed were dressed up for the benefit of the young ones at home.

When my kids were small, despite the “no decorations” mantra that echoed in my ear, I bought an electric menorah to put in the window. I did this primarily because I didn’t want them to experience FOMO (Fear of Missing Out) as I did when I was little and living in a neighborhood filled with homes lit up with Christmas décor which made my home feel so lacking in comparison.   

I remember asking my mom why all our neighbors had lights outlining their homes and we didn’t, and her response was that Hanukkah and Christmas are different kinds of celebrations and should not be approached in the same way.

She said that Hanukkah – known as the “Festival of Lights” – is celebrated by Jews to commemorate the Maccabees’ win in the fight for religious freedom against the Syrian army, in addition to the miracle of oil which lasted for eight days (instead of the anticipated one), shedding important light in the temple in Jerusalem after its desecration. Christmas, on the other hand, is a Christian holiday celebrating the birth of Jesus. 

For Anas, wintertime decorating is a festive activity to share with others, as opposed to a religious act that can in fact separate people. He started to embrace it in the U.S. when he moved here from Morocco some 18 years ago, even though Christmas is not celebrated in his own religion of Islam.

As for me, I’m going to have to step it up a notch with my grandkids (and Anas too, apparently), so that MomMom’s house has some enviable pizazz.

As I prepared latkes for the first night of Hanukkah, I was happy to take out our special tablecloth with menorahs and dreidels printed all over it.  

I asked Anas if it counted as a decoration.

“It’s amazing!” he replied.