The Dress

Whenever a party invitation lands in my mailbox for a dressy occasion like a wedding or a Bar or Bat Mitzvah, I experience the same sequence of thoughts:  1 – Wow! This is so exciting! I can’t wait!  I’m going to have so much fun!  And 2 – Darn!  What am I going to wear?  I hope one of my dresses fits me.  Why didn’t I start working out (this time around) sooner?    

In anticipation of my friend’s daughter’s wedding which was last night, I decided to stop at a local dress shop a couple days ago. I already had a few dresses in my closet but had worn each over the years and thought a last-minute effort might yield a more pleasing choice.  I entered the store with the same mindset for dresses as I have with bathing suits:  Keep in mind my “problem spots” and cover them up. 

It’s a simple enough game plan.  I walk around the store, collect dresses that upon first glance may be potential candidates and then, with a more discriminating eye, determine the next step for each dress:  try it on, put it back on the rack, or leave the store.

This time, I was greeted by a very young and thin woman named Michelle who attached herself to me within seconds.  She asked what I was looking for.  I surprised myself not telling her I’m just browsing so that she’d mind her own business.  She proceeded to comment about my great taste (very smart business decision) as I contemplated various dresses. She brought me shoes to try on (and purchase) and then cheered me on with the one dress I was willing to model for her, all the while bringing me accompanying jewelry options to further enhance the outfit.    

While I really liked the WOW-factor of the dress, I explained that I felt it was a bit too revealing; I didn’t want such a low-cut dress that showcased my cleavage.  This particular body part isn’t one of the problem spots that I try to cover up, but it’s not one that I’m comfortable putting on display either.

“Girlfriend, Show what you’ve got!” she said.  “I’m flat as a board. You know how much fun I’d have if those were mine?”   Wow!  I had never thought about that before.  What the heck.  Why not show off these babies???  I took the dress – sans the shoes and jewelry – and proudly checked out, making this purchase more enthusiastically than any other one I can recall. 

My sexy-dress-but-not-for-me instinct kicked in when I tried it on later that night.  I wasn't nearly as enamored with it in my own home.  While it addressed my problem spot criteria and also offered its own striking personality, I began to question its appeal without Michelle cheering me on.  I ended up wearing a different outfit to the wedding.        

Wouldn’t you know that one minute after I entered the ballroom, a very attractive woman about 15 or 20 years younger caught my eye…and guess what?   She was wearing that very same dress, plunging neckline and all. 

Next month we have another wedding to go to. Want to guess which dress I'm going to wear?